For those who know me well, you know that in the past several years I have dealt with some pretty serious anxiety. I'm not sure what the trigger for me truly was, but I do know the root issue for me was sin. Simply said, I failed to have faith in the fact that God is good and he has promised to provide for me. I failed to believe that God would or even could be my refuge and strength. So, I was depending on my own strength to get me through. The only problem is, I am not capable of this task. I have no control over the things that happen in my life, and yet I spend countless hours, days, weeks, months and years worrying about the provisions for my life. Worrying about the stability of my marriage, my role as a husband and a father, providing for my family, my job, my house and so many other things. The anxiety was literally causing physical effects in my life including major weight loss. It was literally killing me.
Finding the root of this sin was the first step towards my recovery, but through humility letting go of my fear, worry and doubt and allowing God to be LORD over all areas of my life was easier said than done. I'm still a work in progress, but it's amazing the things that God will bring into your life as pointers and reminders of the sanctifying work he's trying to do in your life.
I found this video today, and it spoke directly to me. I could have removed this guys face and placed my own in its place.
Thank you LORD, for providing me answers in some of the strangest places. I'm not where I need to be yet, and God is still working to lead me to a faith that trusts in his goodness alone, but it's little reminders like this that help me live by the grace I need each and every day.
Ghost Ship Documentary: Revelation from Mars Hill Church | Downtown on Vimeo.
For His Glory,
Jason
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